LIVING AN AUTHENTIC LIFE
As I wrap things up with the ladies in The Sovereign Woman (my signature group program) this week, I can't help but feel IMMENSE joy.
Each of every single one of them has shown up for themselves over the past 12 weeks. They made a commitment & despite being in lockdown AND part of a pandemic, kept turning up for themselves.
The last module we covered was all about "Stepping into Authenticity"
While every training & practice they encountered was geared towards building self love & connecting with their authenticity, last week was their official initiation into living an authentic life.
& It left most of them feeling nervous and EXCITED.
Authenticity is MESSY guys & living an authentic life is a commitment. It requires us to tune into ourselves (our wants, needs, emotions) & then act from a place of internal honesty
When we live authentically, our external selves (career, relationships, health) are a match to our internal selves (needs & emotions)
It's as simple as that.
But authenticity is messy because it requires the WILLINGNESS to look bad & f*ck things up! Over & over!
We can only be authentic to the degree that we know ourselves
If we don't know ourselves very well, then authenticity feels hard & out of reach.
Taking the time to connect with our internal world, then acting from that place (which requires vulnerability) is the formula to living an authentic life.
But we need to be willing to do this over & over again.
Because each time we act without knowing our internal truth, we're going to get it 'wrong'. By wrong I mean that we may get the least desired result. E.g. saying ‘yes’, when we mean ‘no’.
& that’s valuable feedback. Our Internal Guidance System (IGS) is always communicating to us through our emotions, thoughts & physical sensations. We're not going to know we're being inauthentic until we receive this feedback.
Authenticity requires us to BE childish. Be curious, be willing to try new things & experiment. Because with each new decision we make & passion we pursue, we're learning about ourselves.
Those who have the greatest desire for authenticity as adults are also the very same individuals who weren't celebrated for their uniqueness as kids.
Authenticity is actually a primary need among humans. We lose touch with our authenticity when our very behaviour threatens our caregivers at a young age. As kids, the most important need is attachment, so if a vulnerable child had to pick between being authentic & losing approval from their caregivers vs. being inauthentic, while getting their need for attachment & closeness met, you know which option they’ll choose. It's a no-brainer!
As adults, we know we're being inauthentic when we’re people pleasing, saying yes when we mean no & continue to stay in relationships & jobs that are well past their expiration date.
To live authentically means to recognise that you’re the ONLY authority of your life. It means taking FULL responsibility for:
Connecting with your emotions
Tuning into your needs & desires
Pursuing your dreams & desires
Learning how to meet your own needs
Surrounding yourself with those that support your commitment to live an authentic life
The day you make a commitment to live more authentically, is the day you’re indirectly signing up to:
Looking bad (because when you act from a place of internal truth, this could be exactly the opposite of what someone needs to hear).
Slowly moving away from, & moving towards people that are willing to be as authentic as you.
Speaking honestly, even if your voice shakes.
No longer blaming anyone outside of yourself for your circumstances.
AND:
Experiencing the deepest joy & satisfaction
Understanding your true purpose
Living life unapologetically
So if we’re signing up for a lifetime of f*ck ups & looking bad, why would you want to live more authentically you ask?
Because through authenticity, we get to recognise & celebrate our originality. We’re fully backing ourselves with every decision we make & become the only person whose opinion matters the most.
Authenticity is the most rewarding place we can come from & it's time for you to experience what it feels like to get this need met.
It's transformational & down right incredible. It gives you clarity & the ability to see that there's ALWAYS someone in your corner. That your flavour of human is not only freaking magnificent but also necessary!
Will you dare to to be authentic?
All my love,
Sanya