When we’re triggered and go in guns blazing to the person opposite us in an attempt to communicate how we feel, what we’re so naively trying to do is communicate in the least straightforward way. What we’re unaware of in that moment is that we’re hurt because a need of ours hasn’t been met due to the circumstances at play. Our feelings have very little to do with the person we’re speaking to, and everything to do with us and our recognition of an unmet need.
NVC is all about identifying this need (life force energy) in a healthy manner and then finding an effective way to communicate this to our friends, family and colleagues in a way that invites them to participate in a conversation. Utalizing effective communication, we can then ask them if they’re willing to contribute to meeting this unmet need and assist us in feeling more of these feelings.
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